Always look on the bright side of life

I’ve been described as cynical, skeptical, nonconformist, negative, stoic, antagonistic, nihilistic, pessimistic and all sorts of other gloomy ics.

And that was just this morning while I was talking to my reflection in the bathroom mirror. 

“But I’ll be danged if you ain’t one handsome feller!” I added in an effort to boost my spirits. I smiled, for a moment, then I realized I was pretty skeptical about my own compliment.

It’s just my nature. Even when I’m perfectly content, I have a look about me that makes folks want to ask me, “Are you OK?”

To which I respond, “Well, above average, maybe.”

I’m not much for talking. Not on the phone. Not in meetings. Not in a large group. Not in a small group. That fifth habit from “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” about listening — seek first to understand, then to be understood — is something I took to heart. Then again, I’m not highly effective, nor does anyone understand me.

Lately, as the election draws closer, a familiar sense of gloom and doom has overwhelmed me at times. It’ll likely get worse after November 5 because it’s liable to be a few days before all the votes are counted. No matter who ultimately wins the presidential election, there is going to be chaos and probably violence.

Yep, I’m quite pessimistic about America’s post-November 5 future.

I’m not one of those folks who vows to leave the country if my candidate doesn’t win. Rarely do those folks follow through on such statements, and it would be really hard to pick up the grandkids from school every now and then if I lived in Canada. (Although, if it keeps getting hotter down South and we never again enjoy a cool night at the fair or a cold night at the high school football game, I might have to consider it.)

I’m making an effort to be more positive with the dark clouds approaching. If worse comes to worst, I’ll retreat to a small cottage in the countryside, where I’ll ride out the rest of my days writing novels. Granted, I’ll probably be dead before anybody reads one, but …

Dang, there I go being negative again.

That’s why I have to be so intentional about being positive. I have to keep reminding myself that no matter how bad things get, there will still be things to enjoy.

Like music, although I can’t go anywhere without hearing horrible bro-country or redundant rap.

And double-chili-cheese Troyburgers, although there’’’ probably be a stray onion on one.

And the beach at Saint Simons Island, though it’ll probably rain for the first time in over a month when I go in a couple of weeks.

And my guitar that I love to strum Jimmy Buffett tunes on, though my middle finger on my left hand is messed up, so there’s almost no chord I can play. (It’s also my “driving finger” that I wave to encourage other drivers to do better by using their blinkers and yielding every once in a while.)

And sitting on a quiet, shady riverbank with a cane pole, hooking bluegill … while skeeters drain my blood and replace it with zika, ebola and West Nile virus.

Hmm, this positivity thing is harder than I thought, so y’all are gonna have to be patient with me.

Of course, I doubt you will.