Category: Newspaper columns

Candid craziness is now an endearing quality

Candid craziness is now an endearing quality

When Donald Trump first came down that escalator in 2015, politics in America changed forever. Like him or not, believe he is truthful or not, think he brought Jesus back to the White House or makes Jesus vomit, whatever — it’s indisputable that politics, particularly at the top of the spectrum, changed forever for better or for worse. Whether we are better off for America’s relatively new politics of personality over principles is not what I’m here to talk about … or type about in this instance. It’s here to stay, so I’m thinking about how we navigate these nasty […]

Were a few hours without some social media sites really so bad?

Were a few hours without some social media sites really so bad?

Last week was the worst week for Facebook since Mark Zuckerberg launched the thing as a way to meet cute girls at Harvard. Even with the fake name “Future Billionaire,” he had a hard time meeting cute girls because (1) that geek would have needed the fake name “Future Trillionaire” to meet cute girls and (2) there are no cute girls at Harvard. Those, and quality football, belong exclusively to the SEC. It all started when a whistleblower went on “60 Minutes” with the breaking news that Facebook and Instagram ain’t exactly good for young folks, especially those who are […]

Normal folks rarely change the world

Normal folks rarely change the world

Photo: Talbotton native Clarence Jordan (left) and Lanett native Millard Fuller at Sumter County’s Koinonia Farm, where each was crazy enough to think they could change the world.    Note: This is an extended version of the column that ran in the October 5, 2021 Columbus Ledger-Enquirer.    It’s Tuesday morning, October 5, which means I’m waking up in a hotel room in Lanett, Alabama — where everyone operates on Eastern Time … except the cell phone towers. (I’m a little tired of having to do math to set the alarm on my cell phone. What’s next? Facebook going down?) (Actually, it’s […]

Sometimes those side effects are real

Sometimes those side effects are real

I’m finally old enough to get the vaccine. Woo-hoo! The shingles vaccine, that is. I’d put it off for a while because I done researched them interwebs myself and found a conservative witch doctor in Nambia who was silenced by social media when he explained that the shingles vaccine Shingrix has only been around since 2017 and is nothing but a money-making hoax that has killed millions, and that shingles can be cured with a mix of Elmer’s glue, Pace chunky salsa and Quaker State that you apply with a badminton racket while lying in a tanning booth (on high/George […]

Are there really only two kinds of people?

Are there really only two kinds of people?

Don’t you just hate it when folks speak in absolute terms? I know I always hate it and will never understand. Folks like to say things such as “It always rains when I plan to do something outside.” Really? Always? I know better than that because clouds always dodge my yard when it needs water, and my grass never gets enough rain. Another absolutism that always gets me is how folks like to make a point starting with, “There are two kinds of people …” I’m fairly certain there are more than two kinds of people. Heck, I can think […]

Desperately needed words of wisdom, Southern-style

Desperately needed words of wisdom, Southern-style

Ever since humans began speaking a couple million years ago — a time anthropologists officially refer to as way back when — man has been sharing words of wisdom, maxims, proverbs, adages, axioms and … Dang it! This online thesaurus site done crashed on me again! Anyway, what I was trying to imply, suggest, intimate, and connote is that ever since the first words of wisdom were spoken by that legendary caveman, uh, make that caveperson Ugh Bugga Jr. — “fire hot” — maxims just keep coming until there are so many that we begin to forget some very valuable […]

When life hands you lemons, ask for limes and mix a serenity potion

When life hands you lemons, ask for limes and mix a serenity potion

If you own a television, a smart phone, a computer, an iPad or have a relationship with anyone named Alexa or Siri, you may have noticed that the world is pretty much going to hell. I mean that in a figurative way, of course, as the world can longer afford to go to hell, what with gas prices and all. You can’t literally go to hell, although it has literally been hot as hell all summer — though hell is more of a dry heat. We’ve got wildfires in California and Greece, hurricanes that blow up overnight and have a […]

Our robot love is getting a little out of hand

Our robot love is getting a little out of hand

The world of entertainment has offered a plethora of promises when it comes to robots. “Star Wars” has probably offered us the most robots — or droids — and made names like R2D2 and C3P0 as familiar as Steve and John. Television kind of got the robot rolling with a robot on “Lost in Space” named — wait for it — Robot. It wasn’t the best show to come out of the 1960s (That would be “The Andy Griffith Show.”), but it did introduce us to some futuristic visions and launched the all-important concept of folks exploring outer space in […]