Tag: COVID

I’m not to the point of looking for my name in the obits, but …

I’m not to the point of looking for my name in the obits, but …

Comedians such as George Burns and Carl Reiner, along with plenty of well-known older folks before and after them, as well as lesser-known older folks, have quipped something to the extent of “Each morning I read the obituaries in the newspaper, and if I’m not in there I get up and make breakfast.” Lesser-known folks to use that line would include my late grandma, who said it often. I’m a little disappointed now to know she was stealing that saying without giving proper credit, but then again I knew somebody who went to church every Sunday, crocheted doilies and made […]

Hate masks? Well, here a few benefits to wearing one that you may not have thought about

Hate masks? Well, here a few benefits to wearing one that you may not have thought about

It’s been about two months since I contracted COVID. I’ve been pretty darn safe through this whole pandemic mess, but I was just two degrees of separation from a science-denier who didn’t take this very seriously. Now, I’ve never been in the top 1 percent of my class, the top 1 percent of income earners or the top 1 percent of guys in People Magazine’s “Sexiest Man Alive” edition, so I’m thankful that I also wasn’t in the less desirable 1 percent — the 1 percent who die after getting COVID. (Or, as the science-deniers will no doubt dispute, the […]

Colonel would never surrender this slogan to a virus!

Colonel would never surrender this slogan to a virus!

I have made every effort to be part of the solution in this whole pandemic mess, and, yet, I still got the virus. I’ve worn a mask in public places, and I’ve stayed home as much as possible. Unfortunately, it appears I was two degrees of separation from a person who thought this was all a hoax and then got others sick. Oh well. It looks like I may survive and just merely may have trouble breathing and be a little bit tired until I die of natural causes — like a meteorite hitting me on the head. It’s 2020, […]

This COVID symptom stinks, although I can’t smell it

This COVID symptom stinks, although I can’t smell it

I can’t wait until Dwayne Johnson — a.k.a. The Rock — someday returns to pro wrestling and then grabs the microphone to scream, “Can you smell what The Rock is cooking?!” so that I can jump out of my seat and reply, “No! Not really!” Then again, I haven’t been a wrestling fan since I was about 8 years old watching folks like Mr. Wrestling No. 2, Tommy “Wildfire” Rich and Abdullah the Butcher stomping around Columbus’ old Municipal Auditorium. And I only saw those matches on TV, never in person. But my point remains the same — I can’t […]

Only an idiot knows everything — especially when it comes to coronavirus

Only an idiot knows everything — especially when it comes to coronavirus

I knew I shouldn’t have eaten that third bat at dinner last night. But, hey, it’s a constitutional right for a man to fill his belly with potentially pandemic-spreading flying rodents. In case you haven’t been on Facebook or Twitter in a while, you may not be aware that everything is a right in today’s America and we have the freedom to do anything. Yep, I got it. As they say in these here parts, “Chris done up and got The Rona.” I was careful, but I’m surrounded by people expressing their “rights” and “freedoms” all up and down aisle […]