The Kudzu Kronicle

Because not all Southerners are the same

Tag: Facebook

Keep this Facebook mess in perspective

Facebook founder CEO and original friend Mark Zuckerberg is set to testify before the Senate Judiciary Committee tomorrow. There is sure to be — as always — plenty of grandstanding by the senators, especially when the TV cameras are on them so that they can perform some of their favorite acting routines.

This is all about privacy, of course. These senators are set to pretend they care about your privacy. Of course, we all know better than that. What are we supposed to believe next? That Scott Pruitt cares about the environment? That Betsy DeVos cares about education? That Sylvester cares about Tweety? C’mon, man!

It’s all a performance. It’s a stage for senators to put together highlight reels for their next campaigns. The senators know it. Zuckerberg knows it. We all know it. If you’re unfamiliar with how these hearings work, here’s a preview of what you will see tomorrow: Continue reading

Even Facebook knows the value of a good snooze

There have been some truly remarkable inventions over the past couple of centuries — the automobile, the airplane, the microwave, the television, the computer and the Weeble Wobble, just to name a handful.

But I think we can all agree that the greatest invention of the past 100 years — perhaps even the last millennium or two — clearly is the snooze button.

Sure, an awful lot of us drive cars, too many of us watch TV and only a handful of disturbed people do not love Weeble Wobbles, but all of us use the snooze button. Those extra nine minutes of sleep — and another nine minutes, and another nine minutes, and “Oh, God! How did it get to be 7:30? I’m late!” — make you truly appreciate how wonderful sleep is.

I know some folks like to brag about how they don’t need much sleep. When I hear of doctors or nurses pulling long shifts without sleep, I’m not impressed but worried.

“Um, would you mind getting someone who’s not shaking from 10 cups of coffee to put that needle in my arm?”

Presidents Clinton, Obama and Trump have all claimed to operate on four to six hours of sleep while in office. This allows the leader of the free world more time to chase interns, pick NCAA brackets or tweet — whichever is the most pressing issue of the moment for that particular administration. Continue reading

A few weeks ago, I wrote a column about having to buy a new iPhone because my old piece of junk would not let me film Facebook Live videos, something that is now needed with my real job at The Fuller Center for Housing. Well, I got the phone yesterday and tested out the Facebook Live feature today. Next week, The Fuller Center will begin regular Facebook Live chats. I’ll do it on my writer Facebook page whenever I get the urge. Today, I just wanted to make sure I kinda sorta understood this newfangled technology.

 

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