Tag: ukraine

My exclusive interview with Vladimir Putin

My exclusive interview with Vladimir Putin

One of the great things I love about being a world-famous journalist is the way prominent people jump at the chance to be interviewed by me … Me: Hi everyone. As you can see, I’ve got my serious journalist face on and my formal flip-flops. Welcome to my new special “Nine people ruining the world for the other 8 billion.” Today, I’m speaking with Russian dictator — not president — Vladimir Putin. Hello. V: Hello. Me: Thanks again for wearing a shirt. Now, first of all, you said that you had to invade Ukraine to get rid of the Nazis. […]

Let’s reconsider a few poorly used words and terms

Let’s reconsider a few poorly used words and terms

Mark Twain once said the difference between the right word and the wrong word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug. That’s kinda true. Of course, it’s not the only difference. No one ever ran out to catch a lightning bolt in an old Mason jar with holes in the top. Well, except maybe Ben Franklin. He drank a lot and had some weird fascination with electricity. In fact, I doubt Mark Twain ever said that — he wrote that. Today’s lesson is about choosing the right word, for there is a huge difference between saying something and […]

The Bobs from “Office Space” need to meet with the U.N. Security Council

The Bobs from “Office Space” need to meet with the U.N. Security Council

If you Google “U.N. Security Council,” “Security Council” or “What the heck is the point of this stupid Security Council if it’s completely impotent and can’t stop the sickening onslaught and war crimes in Ukraine,” the top result is probably going to be the website — www.un.org/securitycouncil. It’s possible that I’m the one who used that third Google search term and wound up on that page, where I noticed something very interesting. It was the very first sentence on the website, which I thought might indicate something rather important: “The Security Council has primary responsibility for the maintenance of international […]

Journalists fight for truth even as feces-flingers prefer propaganda

Journalists fight for truth even as feces-flingers prefer propaganda

Right now in Russia, purveyors of “fake news” (deemed as such by that bastion of truthfulness and decency The Kremlin) can face a 15-year prison sentence under a new law enacted by truth-fearer Vladimir Putin and his gutless cohorts. This is on top of a 2019 “fake news” law that had somewhat lighter penalties with smaller fines and less jail time but that always-scary mark on your permanent record. I got that “permanent record” warning a lot when I was in school, though I was never really sure what it meant. I remain scared that someday when I try to […]

I’ll take “Things that don’t bother me for $200,” please

I’ll take “Things that don’t bother me for $200,” please

We’ve all learned a lot about Ukraine in recent weeks in months — like where it is, how resilient their people are and how to pronounce the name of its capital and biggest city, Kiev (or Kyiv). As long as I can remember — I mean, like, going back months — I’ve called it KEE-ev. So did most folks, including government officials and journalists. As it turns out, that’s the way Russians pronounce it. Ukrainians pronounce it KEEV. And if that’s the way the Ukrainians want it, by golly, they’ve got it. The heck with the Russian way. Yet, I […]

The top-secret transcript of Biden’s last call with Putin

The top-secret transcript of Biden’s last call with Putin

Some of you may not know that writing newspaper columns, books and blogs is not my real job. I mean, it all pays incredible money and I often roll around naked in cash like Demi Moore in “Indecent Proposal,” but I do have a real job — on the White House staff as an advisor to the president. I spend a lot of time with President Joe Biden helping him navigate the complexities of the Covid response, increasing inflation amid even-further-increasing corporate profits and handling his Twitter account. Lately, though, I’ve spent a lot of time helping him with the […]